You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
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