I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Of course I have a pirate flag
I love you. Go after that dick
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
