Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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