If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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