I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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