What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
