My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize