My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
My vagina is officially offended.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize