Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
