Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
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but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
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So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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