i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
