I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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