I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I know her cup size but not her name....
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