But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize