Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
