No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
