Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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