Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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