I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
