Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
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