don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
