Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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