plz talk dirty to me
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize