So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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