UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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