apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
