The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
