oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize