So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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