Pappa wants mamma naked
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Randomize
