So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize