Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
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I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
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He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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