i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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