Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am http://tfl.nu/6qjs
  Replies (7) Good night (2107) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be http://tfl.nu/xlfe
  Replies (29) Good night (3068) Bad night (1426)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I want my thong back.

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I hate you tequila.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong... (612): I want my thong back. (763): I hate you tequila. http://tfl.nu/u481
  Replies (16) Good night (5026) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel. http://tfl.nu/c4zc
  Replies (42) Good night (1538) Bad night (4874)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy??? http://tfl.nu/4rkp
  Replies (30) Good night (746) Bad night (4894)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class (1-203): why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday. http://tfl.nu/0z2t
  Replies (4) Good night (3628) Bad night (575)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry http://tfl.nu/mjn0
  Replies (5) Good night (1490) Bad night (620)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (506): Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident http://tfl.nu/1apo
  Replies (7) Good night (1473) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Some girl just showed me her stretch marks

  (757): View more from Virginia

  You need to get out of tn

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): Some girl just showed me her stretch marks (757): You need to get out of tn http://tfl.nu/alqm
  Replies (7) Good night (514) Bad night (1540)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  "Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): "Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life. http://tfl.nu/f41e
  Replies (3) Good night (581) Bad night (1074)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great. http://tfl.nu/f48j
  Replies (9) Good night (1225) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am http://tfl.nu/x5gh
  Replies (14) Good night (382) Bad night (1374)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick. http://tfl.nu/t0hp
  Replies (6) Good night (956) Bad night (306)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away... http://tfl.nu/ltxy
  Replies (4) Good night (643) Bad night (413)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem http://tfl.nu/jbp9
  Replies (4) Good night (420) Bad night (299)

Randomize