he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
