are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I am never drinking with the goths again.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
