i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
