Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I love you. Go after that dick
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
