I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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