Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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