Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
