I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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