dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
