Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
mondays should just be called national damage control day
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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