I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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