I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
