Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
