You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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