i already hear my dad disowning me
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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