ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize
