We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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